Kisses from Kenya Episode 9: From Morals to Morale

Premiered on 30 Mar 2026  Kisses From Kenya

EPISODE 9: Morals to Morale

What's the difference between morals and morale - and why does living abroad make that question suddenly urgent? Brendan and Vuyanzi connect the FBI's fear-based collapse, press freedom under attack, and the cultural standards you didn't know you'd inherited until Kenya quietly rewrote them.

In this episode:

• Whose America Is It Anyway? - the FBI under Kash Patel and why morale in a federal agency matters to all of us; the New York Times sues the Pentagon over press access rules
• Lost in Translation - things that are polite in America that land as strange in Kenya, and vice versa
• Deep Dive - how morals shape the emotional climate around you; what living abroad reveals about the moral code you were handed; how Kenya has quietly shifted what both hosts value
• Queer & Black Joy - community gatherings, unexpected connection, and a Black woman making historical fiction podcasts

Democrats Abroad Kenya | Expat life Africa | Kash Patel FBI | Press freedom 2026 | Black diaspora podcast | American values abroad | Nairobi expat community | Queer Africa

Kisses from Kenya is the podcast for Americans living abroad who haven't stopped paying attention. Enjoying the show? Share it with someone else living abroad who's asking the same questions. Subscribe for new episodes.

#KissesFromKenya #DemocratsAbroad #PressFreedom #FBI #MoralsVsMorale #BlackDiaspora #QueerJoy #ExpatsOfKenya #AmericanAbroad

Transcript

Vuyanzi 0:06

Hey, Kisses from Kenya is produced by Democrats Abroad Kenya, but everything you hear in this podcast reflects our personal perspectives.

Brendan 0:20

Yes, nothing we say should be taken as the official stance of Democrats Abroad Kenya, Democrats Abroad Global, or the Democratic Party. And this is an entertainment space and not an official policy platform.

Vuyanzi 0:33

Thank you.

Brendan 0:36

Hey y'all, Brendan here. Fuyanzi here. Welcome to Kids Is From Kenya, the show where the morals are low and the morale is high.

Vuyanzi 0:46

And when they go low, like that man once said, the councilman from Flint, God rest his soul, we go lower.

Brendan 0:54

I mean, Cardi said we go to hell. She said, whatever Michelle Obama said, when they go low, I take it to hell. Oh, that would have been a good idea. I know we don't talk much about morals on this show, probably because, you know. But I think with a lot of us. The word literally means standards of behavior and principles of right and wrong.

Vuyanzi 1:17

And and right and wrong, that's pretty interesting when you're living abroad. Uh today we're going to pair be pairing that with morale, the spirit, the energy, the vibe, which brings us straight to our first segment. Damn it. Who's America is it anyway? And um this one, like, and and I'll you'll elaborate more on this, but right now a report came out, not right now, but a report, an internal report has come out saying that under FBI, under uh cash patel, it has become paralyzed by fear. That part is in quotes. Moral morale is collapsing, and agents are afraid to act. This is an FBI. So, okay, because I know you have a lot more to say because this has just come on my radar because it's too much on the radar. So I purposely get things off the radar. And I'm thinking about when you have people living in fear and living in anxiety, and they have one of the most important jobs to do. And I'm not saying that all of what FBI has done is right. Let's let's be clear. Anyone ever heard of J. Iker Hoover? Yeah.

Brendan 2:34

So so like it was just the anniversary of um Fred Hampton's assassination by the FBI.

Vuyanzi 2:43

Like, that was the FBI, right?

Brendan 2:44

Yeah, I think it was the FBI.

Vuyanzi 2:47

It would it would have been, I think, more like the FBI.

Brendan 2:49

Yeah, that was like two days ago.

Vuyanzi 2:50

Oh wow. So so this so we know that they aren't, but those are the things though that get exposed. So imagine for the bunch of things that are right and that they're rightfully investigating, but they're scared to act. So I'm just curious what is your thought around it? Because, like I said, you probably had heard of it before I did.

Brendan 3:12

I mean, you know, men and their fragile ego. So that's like the that's basically the biggest thing, right? Is that like my understanding is that like, I mean, you know, you know, like when people know they're in over their head, you know, they become very like kind of like they'd be ready to like go for the jugular on anyone. And I feel like that's cash patel. Because I'm like, I mean, I told you that that man looked goobly eye to start with, but he said he looks like the like from the show, a character from that show Dinosaur.

Vuyanzi 3:48

Some of you are old enough to remember that. And I, yes, I agreed. Oh my god.

Brendan 3:54

Yeah, so it's just, I mean, like apparently it's like he's he's so afraid of looking bad that it's like that's why people don't want to do anything, right? Because it's like they can just get booted out for nothing. And then you know there was that whole thing about how like he was pissed because someone leaked about the fact that his pri he took the private jet to go see his girlfriend at the wrestling. Yeah, and his girlfriend is uh She ain't even doing the wrestling, she's the one singing the national anthem. Can you imagine if someone had used the private jet to go see like Fergie's in that national anthem at that all-star game?

Vuyanzi 4:29

That girl probably don't even sing the look at what she wins. I was thinking, can we get a clip of the now? Oh, we should insert that in here. We should find that clip. Somebody has it for sure.

Brendan 4:42

Speaking of low morale, um, the New York Times recently used to the Pentagon. Why? Because there were new rules that were released by the Pentagon requiring journalists to get approval before reporting, even on things that are unclassified. So stuff that you and I can literally go look up in a book. Um, and so major outlets refuse, they return their press badges, they basically said we're just not gonna cover this then. And so only those who um are willing to sign this restrictive agreement get access. I mean, I think it's hilarious that like here it says forming a curated next gen press court, it's literally fucking Laura Loomer in all these fucking nutcases with like no offense podcasts. Like anyone with a fucking like Bluetooth lapel mic is up there like can you tell me why they have not yet arrested Hillary Clinton for her email, even though it's the year 2025? So all these fucking like these people about to be the ones crowding around our room shooting at people, and they the ones going to the White House. I mean, well, that could work in our family. I know let's try to keep in the world. Anyway, the New York Times argues that this violates the first and fifth amendments, and they're seeking a court injunction. So, I mean, it's like you got morale and an entire federal agency, literally like the federal police force, like investigative police force that's collapsed because the person's running that thing by fear.

Vuyanzi 6:20

And doesn't the press have a job to do? And I don't mean by it's their literal job, but what what does the press do in society? Yeah. Um, and they help to keep that morale in society, keep society informed, but they're being restricted from doing that job when we think about. I mean, listen, what's right and what's wrong?

Brendan 6:39

There's a lot of shit wrong with especially the New York Times, like all raggedy piece of rag with that.

Vuyanzi 6:44

I'm I'm surprised that it's still around.

Brendan 6:46

But anyway, I'm surprised they're willing to sue. I'm surprised they're not out there writing a pinch of pieces, like, well, you know, like against the new press restrictions, you must be a member of Hamas.

Vuyanzi 6:57

Yeah. Um This is giving right and wrong a whole new meaning.

Brendan 7:07

But yeah, I mean, I think I'm sorry. There's that idea of morale morale, but also morals. And I feel like actually what's interesting is like a lot of times, like the more you actually because morals are funny, right? Because it's also something that could go either way.

Vuyanzi 7:25

Yeah.

Brendan 7:26

Because I feel like my morals are actually like what makes me like a halfway decent person, according to most people. I mean, some of these dumb dumb but like but then also it's like people will weaponize morals like in a way that I think ultimately always seems to, in the end, undermine morale, right? Because it's like when you feel like you're being policed all the time by people that think they're better than you, yeah, yeah. Usually for no reason, because most of the time they are.

Vuyanzi 7:53

Yeah, right. I but and and I mean this is like the more I think about the whole idea of morals, it it could be like in many different episodes, right? Because the weaponizing and politicizing right and wrong, because no more is it about views, it's really about what's right and what's wrong. If you hear some of these now probably dead Congress people from back in the day, so let's say maybe 50, it's not that long ago, uh, 50 or plus years ago, they said in government they could be on the opposite sides of the aisle. However, their families took vacations, they went out to eat together. And I have to think that apart, it didn't mean that they didn't argue. However, there's a part of me that has to believe that morals somehow comes into this because it was about what your view was, and our views are completely different. However, when we fast forward to today, and and when I say today, maybe maybe I should go back farther than 50 years for that, but when I say today, even in the past, let's say 20 years, there's been a shifting about your political party represents right or wrong, not a certain view about a certain thing. So go back to what you said. If you're being like, if you're being like uh uh what is the word? Like your life is wrong, the way you do it is bad. It's good or bad, it's it's not right. Your whole belief, how you live. So I do think it maybe it's something that's an underlying thought that I don't even know how deep we're going into it on a regular basis or how our bodies are reacting. However, that's what it's feeling like. If you're not, and especially going to the type of church or churches that I've been to, let me, it's about to go deep for a second. Because church was one thing and and the right or wrong there. However, what began to happen is one of this church that I went to, believe it or not, it was super, super Republican. This one church, white Republican conservative in New Jersey, and they hated Obama. He was President Obama was in at the time, and it they're and they're like Obama did it, you know. Like, I I mean, and there was like five or six black people in the church, and half of them were happened to be Kenyan. It was weird. A lot, a few of them came from Kenya, and there was only six of us there. However, it's like they really based it on morals, what's right or what's wrong. And especially when it came to abortion, we could go. I want to pause there because I know I'm talking a lot, but go ahead. What's your thought? What say you? And then we have to move on. So sorry, we're not supposed to spend so much time here. That's why they get long.

Brendan 10:46

No, I mean, I think like the the place I often diverged with people in my church growing up was like this idea of um, and I think often it comes in in politics too, right? Like I think for me it's like I almost liken it to like behavior management kind of approaches and like the legalism. Where it's like, it's like, are you gonna do are you gonna not do the wrong thing because you're afraid of it, or are you gonna do the right thing because it's the right thing to do? Right. And those are two very different like mindsets, right? And so I find that like a lot of times in more conservative Christian spaces, it's like don't do that because if you do it, you're going to help. As opposed to the idea of like, well, the right thing to do is this, and therefore you should choose that because it's like the better path. And I get into fights with the like like because I have some cousins that are definitely like on that end of the spectrum. And when we talk about things like abortion, for instance, like I'm always like, the point of the like, I'm like, for me, like like the crux of the matter is that, you know, and sorry we're being religious today, but I think this applies to many different Yeah, absolutely.

Vuyanzi 12:00

And we were talking about morals, so this is great.

Brendan 12:02

Like, I'm like, if you want to talk about something like abortion, for instance, like it says in the Bible that God gave us free will. And part of the reason that that free will is important from a theological standpoint is because like you choosing the right path is actually like you earning salvation, right? It's not the act of not choosing the sin, it's the act of choosing the correct path. Preach, Pastor Bridge. So if you're telling me that essentially I can't go down the sinful path because you barricaded it shut, then you're essentially robbing me of my ability to choose the right path. The free will that you've got to be. You've only given me that path to go down. Yeah, yeah. And so that's why like I think it's beautiful when you think about like um, you know, like like the Amish, for instance, like how they like allow their kids to go out just to hear the Rose Springer. Yes. They go out, live in the world, do everything, and when you come back, you make the informed decision about like what's the right path for you to take. Like that's the active, like that's the active act of choosing grace over sin, right? How do you do that? So when it comes to things like abortion dance, I'm like, even if you think that abortion is like the wrong act to take, you should be trying to convince people that this other path is the better choice to take rather than cutting off their access to that thing if they so choose it. That's great.

Vuyanzi 13:28

Oh, that is good. I know your cousins be mad at you.

Brendan 13:32

They don't want to talk to me about this kind of stuff. Because I'm like, y'all want to act like just because I'm out here, you know, do it as a pet, but like, I don't know nothing about no theology. Wow. I mean it's a good study school, baby. Okay, let's take a little bit of a 10-point argument.

Vuyanzi 13:50

Oh, I love it. And root it's a that's a little that's the Pentecostal Jake. That's the Pentecostal J when all the speeches rushed out. And speaking of being right and wrong differently, here we come with loss in translation. So who decides what's right? Um I can share this uh really quickly, and I can share it all the time in business. Now we're not talking about dating or weird friendships, but in business, what I noticed is here in the country, if there's something that someone doesn't want to do, like you could have had a great conversation, submitted proposals, you said, okay, we're gonna do this, and then all of a sudden the person like disappears, they stop answering your calls, they don't answer your emails, they literally disappear, but you know they're there, but they disappear. Um that feels so wrong to me in business. I don't know that it's wrong, but it feels like it it it to me, I feel like I deem it as the wrong thing to do. That if you decide that this is not the path you want to go down in some business deal, then you just say, Hey, I don't want to do this. Yeah. So, but when you speak to, and I've had conversations with Kenyans about this, it's like they don't like it either, but many of them underst are understanding to it. They said, one person said, of no, a couple of people said to me, Kenyans don't like to give bad news. Don't go baddy, baby. No bad news.

Brendan 15:42

Sorry, I watched the whiz last week. It is a Thanksgiving movie, by the way.

Vuyanzi 15:49

Oh, the Wiz is a Thanksgiving movie. All right, Sean. Ah, okay, so fine. I'll watch it. I'm late, but I'll watch it. But uh, so so it feels wrong. So, but I'm deciding that it's wrong based upon my culture, so it's really wrong. Um yeah, I don't know uh any experiences you've had.

Brendan 16:10

I want to check this for one second because I'm pairing that I didn't press record.

Vuyanzi 16:14

Oh god. What if you did?

Brendan 16:16

No, it's recording. It's okay. We're good, we're good. Okay. I need the cute guy for the channel. You wanna say what she's doing?

Vuyanzi 16:23

Oh, you said we're recording.

Brendan 16:25

It's recording. Oh my god! Holy straight to Tinder. But um, no, I so yes, I've definitely seen that. Um I also like so for me it happens a lot around um and it's also like I have a very specific trigger around this thing because of all of my like psychological issues. But um like when people change plans or like they're not gonna come, you know, to something, right? And so they'll like ghost you instead of just saying like hey, something came up, or they communicate like really late, right? And so this actually was like also part of like this whole time timeliness thing that we were talking about last week. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And it it's like one of those where it's like I keep telling my Kenyan friends, like I'm like, guys, like I understand that like your fear is of disappointing me. Yeah, but what you need to realize is that like like if you're not coming, like I'm gonna be disappointed either way. Like, that's not gonna like the baseline disappointment is not gonna like magically go away unless you somehow teleport yourself here and remove the source of the disappointment, which is your absence. However, if you've now forced me to sit and wait for you and then you've like delivered the disappointment later, it's now compounded by all the time that I spent waiting for you when I didn't need to. Which you know, especially like when you talk about like a little like a little boom boom session. You know, like I'm a man, like this requires preparation. I don't want to go into detail about what it is, but it takes some time. You know, you think all the hours after you're doing all this work, like with a roto booter.

Vuyanzi 18:17

Even here it takes time for different things. Yeah, so I was like, first of all, don't be surprised that I made other plans because I'm not about to waste this. Yeah, I listen, even me picking up my phone, I'm looking for someone to text me. You just think you're gonna text me. Right. So text me, or just say, I can't meet.

Brendan 18:36

So I'm like, you're you're making it worse by like avoiding it and then like standing the amount of time that it takes to just tell me. Number one. And number two, like, I was like, anybody that knows me knows that my calendar and I know you're the same way, it's like things are over the second time. Yes, yes. And so I'm like, not only could I have been making money during this time if I wanted to, but number two, now I sound like a sex worker, but sex work is work, but um also sounds like a poster, like a sticker.

Vuyanzi 19:10

Sex work is work.

Brendan 19:12

Um, but also like like I I went off on something about this a couple weeks ago because I'm like, if I had wanted to, I could have chosen to make claims with someone else. Like, like I have a lot of people that I both want to see and meet to see. Oh my god, yes, yes, and so I carved time out of that schedule to spend with you. Which again, if you're not gonna come, it's fine. Like shit happens. Yeah, but if like we, you know, had if I had three hours on my schedule blocked off to be with you, and you waited until an hour and a half into that time block to tell me why coming, you know, I could have called somebody and been like, hey, you want to go like go for like a coffee real quick or something like there's so many other things I could have done.

Vuyanzi 19:55

Well, and that's enough, well, I and and I think okay, you know what? I'll admit then. Yes, indeed, indeed. So I mean, we could just talk about this intersection of morals versus morale, right? We know morals is what's right and wrong, and really morale is about the energy, the the energy and what's there. And um, you know, thinking about, and and I think you've already touched on this, but maybe I don't know, we could go a little bit deeper, the morals shaping the whole emotional climate. So we think about what's going on politically in the United States, and morale is low, however, why is morale low? I mean, this whole thing about right and wrong and and and the politicizing and weaponizing of everything, like where are we? How do we, when the leaders are doing this, maybe the question becomes how do we keep morale high? How do we keep our vibration high? How do we keep happiness and joy in the midst of so much? How do we keep that morale high in the midst of so much that's going on?

Brendan 21:08

Well, I I think part of it, like unfortunately, like some of that thinking, I think is something that we also fall into on the left. Which talk about the thing is like we fall into that same trap of like if you don't believe X, Y, Z, like you're not a good person. Which, like, to be clear, like, I do have some lines that I draw. I will never be a genocide apologist, for instance. A whoop apologist. A genocide apologist. So, like, you know, I'm not over here to make nice with people that like think it's okay to like murder people because of the color of their skin or other parts of their ethnicity. Y'all know what I'm talking about, but I don't want to be canceled by those people either. Um but like like that is like never like a line that I'm gonna draw. But it's like, for instance, even like I'll say, like, as like a member of the LGBT community, it's like somehow we've like reached this level where it's like. It's like we view people who have some like homophobic tendencies as like not good people, like inherently not good people. Okay, yes, and that directly clashes with the idea that people can learn and grow, right? Because it's like if you're saying that this is like a like a character trait, that I'm not a good person, like character traits are mostly immutable. Wow. So I think that in some ways that makes us more depressed on the left, because like I think that that way of thinking is very low vibration. So as opposed to viewing people as changeable and like able to learn.

Vuyanzi 22:39

I love this what you're bringing up. And even when you just said because I don't want to get canceled, let's think about the whole idea around that. Why do we even have that?

Brendan 22:48

I remember hearing about to be clear, I'm not worried about cancel like cancellation. I'm worried about like the fact that a certain state in the Middle East produces all of the surveillance on technology over the world, and I want my bank accounts to be frozen.

Vuyanzi 23:01

We mean literally cancel. But the whole idea of cancel culture, that's around it. I it's around, oh, you're a bad person because she says this. There's no grace in cancel culture. You know, when we're thinking about morale and morals, is there any grace? You know, even Paul, let's go to the word. Paul said, your grace is your grace is sufficient. But the thing is that I mean, it's really well.

Brendan 23:32

I mean, think about it, right? It's like if we were to use either of our like what I would call our signature issues based on our identities. Yes. You know, it's like I think both of us come from communities that often on the internet are like real mad at people because of X, Y, and Z. And not to say that like the anger is not, you know, justified. You know, it's like if somebody, you know, is out here saying faggot, like, yeah, I'm gonna kick your ass too. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But like it's it's like so, but it at some point it becomes like a question of like, what do you want? Right? So it's like we're we're gonna drag you on the internet, we're gonna tell you you're a bad person, blah, blah, blah but it's like, what do you hope the outcome is? Oh my gosh, that's such a good question. Because it's like if all you're gonna do is beat me over the head and tell me I'm a piece of shit, yeah. Like, where in that there am I actually learning something?

Vuyanzi 24:24

And what's the difference really between them and them doing that and you and you not you per se, but you doing beating over the head, because right now that thing is really happening a lot. I I've definitely done it. I know it. Oh, okay. But there's it's really pervasive right now on the internet coming up on my feed where they do catch someone out doing something egregious, calling people the inward, a white person calling people the inward, and then they're exposing them. I guess they have them lose their jobs, and I'm part of that too, because I'm like, yeah, they should, yeah, they're bad. They should get fired, and maybe they should and maybe they shouldn't. I don't know.

Brendan 25:02

But I think in that if you're in a position where you're actively harming people, like through through your job, for instance, then like I don't think that's a bad thing, right?

Vuyanzi 25:13

But I don't know that that's it's the case.

Brendan 25:15

But it's like, are you also learning anything in that process?

Vuyanzi 25:18

Right, and I don't know that any of these people, and and we can say because of how they are, maybe these white folk don't care and they don't want to learn. There's license with Trump being in office, there's license to say what you want to say more than ever. Yes, you can say what you want to say, but there's license to be more free with you know, whatever it is. Exactly.

Brendan 25:39

At that moment, your black little heart, not black little hurt if you talk about it.

Vuyanzi 25:44

Right. Because we don't want to say black is bad. And you're shriveled little heart. Exactly. Ugly and just shriveled. Well, we don't want to discriminate against ugly or shriveled. So anyway, but these these are good conversations. Um, and I think I also want to um, and and okay, and it's just the morale as a collective. I like this really quickly because if we can all, you say we do it to ourselves. So think about as the collective, and now I want to change the algorithm on my Instagram because I'm being part of the collective, watching I almost said, I almost said bad people, and I have to be careful of that. Watching people do bad things and being egregious, and then people going after them in one way, like, okay, I can I just say one thing, I guilty.

Brendan 26:34

I like paramedios. I'll be watching every paramedium.

Vuyanzi 26:38

No, these I don't even know who they are. They just started appearing on my feed. But one woman, they're in a store, and um, a black woman says to the white woman, call me an in again. I will punch you in your face. And then the older white, well, why would she do this? The the black woman is clearly like 20 to 30 years younger than her, and she's and she wasn't both of them, you know, had to meet on their phone. And then the the white lady said, and she, and that that black lady said, really? I don't control violence. But when I saw how she she knew what for that white lady's face, but she's like, if she finds the word in chat, do you still want to get back? And she got like spine straightened chest out. She thought she was ready to do something. Wait, wait, wait a minute. That girl's like, I'm so sorry. That's it. But but am I contributing to morale being low in in the ways in an indirect way by being part of the collective that's watching that kind of thing?

Brendan 27:43

I thought it was fascinating because there was like maybe like a month or so ago, there was like a video making the rounds on Instagram and stuff. And it was a woman who was, you know, like testifying at one of these, either like a council meeting or like before the state legislature, whatever, like about like a piece of legislation. I think it was dealing with like conversion therapy for LGBTQ use or whatever. And so um, you know, she was like, I'm just here because like, you know, like I like I did this to my son and he killed himself. And so, like, you know, she's like, so now I like I'm an advocate, like I've changed because like I know it can happen, and you know, like all these people are like sharing, like, oh, heartwarming, blah blah blah. And I'm just like, half of the people I see sharing this and calling it heartwarming are the same people that if we had a video clip of this woman back then at that time, and that was what would circulate, it would be like, fuck you, yeah, yeah. But the thing is, like this this woman's journey from like that to this was not because of a bunch of strangers on the internet telling her that she should kill herself. Because like that's like where people take it to. Right, absolutely, and so it's like in some ways it becomes like a like an outlet for people's trauma in a way that's like not actually like productive. No, it's not helpful, and again, like it lowers your own vibration because it's many people converging. Yeah, in your own trauma. Yes, yes, and it's like I think we've somehow like I think in part because like mental health culture has like weirdly converged with social media in ways that I think are like actually unhelpful, like people have kind of conflated like letting out like some of that emotion with like with like fixing it.

Vuyanzi 29:40

But it's like it doesn't actually fix it, it's fix it ain't fixing it.

Brendan 29:43

Like you're actually trapped in like that feeling.

Vuyanzi 29:47

So um I love it. I love it. So let's get some joy. Let let's bring the let's raise the vibration here. Oh well, we can't also we can't do that, right? Yeah, because we're copyrighted. Sorry, Pharrell.

Brendan 30:03

I got no money, so please we go to court, you're gonna have to pay me.

Vuyanzi 30:10

Like, sir, you're 80. You still look 12, but uh okay, so I had a moment of joy just yesterday. Uh this Kenyan woman, and I actually want to, I want to shout out her podcast as I say this, because she was um she was great. So she's working on a book. So she already has a she already had her name is Monda, and her podcast is Afro Way to Afro Afre Way to. I really botched that up. Her podcast is Afre Way To, and she is a storyteller. So she talks about um historical, well, historical um history in Africa. And she makes it exciting. You kind of know about it. However, right now she's going to be working on a book, and it is it'll be historical fiction, maybe like sci-fi. The way she was talking about it, it's not just the past, it's the past, the present, but it centers all around African people, African-centered. And it just brought me so much joy to hear, to see, to see her in her beauty and her blackness, if you will. She's Kenyan. And um, that she's doing that. I was like, when do I hear uh because she's writing this book, so I might as well say she's an author. Like, I'm not into that uh into that scene of fantasy or sci-fi. I'm not, but I did watch the black sci-fi uh show a few years back. I don't remember, but it was like, it's the only black sci-fi show.

Brendan 31:45

I don't know why that oh I know the one what is it called? It was really good, and I'm not into it. So good. Oh, but this is gonna bother me so much.

Vuyanzi 31:53

And it had to do that, right? I uh so some cable station, and I think the guy who's Angela Bassett's husband was in it. Yeah, that one. I know so to hear this black woman talking about that and she's there building and writing a book around it, it brought me so much joy. And we're gonna figure out this show. Maybe you guys can tell us. Part of it's like set in like an asylum or something. It wasn't in an asylum, but it was something with going, oh, maybe it was anyway. Okay. I know Courtney Vance is his name. Yeah. I just know I loved it. It was so good. I know exactly what you're talking about. Yeah. How many seasons? But it only had like two seasons, maybe. Yeah, yeah. So if not someone knows the name of the show, you can drop it in the comments.

Brendan 32:35

It's like so close to my.

Vuyanzi 32:37

I feel like it's a country something. Is it country?

Brendan 32:41

Yeah, Lovecraft Country. Yes! I was like, I know the first word is an author's name, it's HP Lovecraft. Lovecraft country.

Vuyanzi 32:49

Uh oh, that's that's how my little brain leap frogs. What about your joy? Joy? Queer joy.

Brendan 32:59

Again, I gotta think of what. I know, but I'm like, oh, my lord. That's for another kind of paid interest. That's only fans. But this is where I'm gonna soft lunch, is not a top. Um, so it is related to so I I'll share the PG version. Is that okay? Um how PG like PG Okay, fine. There will be no juicy detail.

Vuyanzi 33:36

Okay.

Brendan 33:37

So I thought this was like, so um I'm like, how much do I want to share? So I identify as someone who is a survivor of sexual assault more than one time. Okay. Um and so I still want to say sorry to hear that. Um and so I had an interaction with someone this week um who like much more recently had an experience with sexual assault. And so um I think I don't know if I was like his first like encounter since like that point in time, but like one of the first. And like he had shared, like before we like met up, you know, like you know, even though he still didn't my DMs. Um he was like, you know, I'm just like really nervous, like I don't know. Like, and so I was very much like, you know, like why don't we just like meet up, like meet up, like get to know each other a little bit, we can talk, like there's no pressure, like we don't have to do anything, we can just talk.

Vuyanzi 34:42

We don't have to take our clothes off to have a good time.

Brendan 34:48

But we did, but I knew but essentially I was just like you're at the driver's seat, I was like, and like there were a lot of there were a lot of check-ins like throughout the entire process just to make sure everyone was like okay. Yeah, and at the end, after he, you know, finished, yeah. The first thing he said was that felt so safe, and it just like warmed my little heart. I told my friend when I was texting her about this, I was like, a tear trickled from my whorish eye.

Vuyanzi 35:28

My wizard old heart I love it. I just thought that was really beautiful. I think absolutely the safe that saying that he felt safe, that meant everything, and that says so much about you.

Brendan 35:49

Well, I mean, it's just I think we should all both strive to feel safe and to make other people safe. So anyway, speaking of all sea, like like a a story that would not match with some people's morals, but I think shows a degree of morality in the process.

Vuyanzi 36:08

Oh my god. Okay, I love the way you just brought that in.

Brendan 36:13

I'm preaching this week, y'all! So on that note, yeah, morals do shape the world we think we're living in. Emphasis I'm thinking sometimes. And morale shapes the world that we actually feel.

Vuyanzi 36:27

And living abroad teaches you that both can shift, and maybe that's exactly what growth looks like. You know what that is? Yeah, that's growth.

Brendan 36:38

So until next time.

Vuyanzi 36:40

Stay curious, stay open, and as always, kisses for the ma.